First dates suck. 

You take this big risk, get dressed up, and do all of this planning to get to know a person who actually isn’t even showing up to the date (shout out to 1^st date representatives)!  If you go to the movies, you can’t actually converse with your date.  You don’t want to simp spend a lot of money on an expensive dinner.  You want to think outside of the box and do something different without being thought of as weird.  Really… who wants to play paintball on a first date? 

There is an easy solution to this:  The Pre-Date.

It’s so brilliant!  I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it before!  A Pre-Date works like this:  You meet up and do something casual just to see if you would like to continue on to an actual 1^st date.  There is no pressure on the man to pay or leave his wallet at home accidentally.  Just do something casual, and go Dutch. The something casual could be something as simple as meeting for drinks after work.  You can get all of the awkward, preliminary 1^st date questions out of the way… Questions such as, “So, what’s your plan for the next 5 years?  Do you plan on getting married? Have you ever, out of your own free will, done crack? Swallow much?”  It’s also a great opportunity to see if you have any kind of chemistry.  And if you hit it off?  Congratulations!  You have successfully completed and qualified during the application/pre-screening process.  You will now be granted an interview… and we all know how much we lie exaggerate in interviews.

Here are some great ideas for a Pre-Date:

1)  Happy Hour/Drinks After Work – Not only do you get alcohol, but you get to see if they really have a job or not.  Plus a drink or two can allow both of you to relax.

2) Coffee Shop – Same as happy hour but minus the booze.

3) Lunch – Before deciding on going to dinner, why not have lunch?  Just like meeting for drinks after work, it’s a great way to see someone in their element. 

So, to everyone out there, what are some other good ideas for a Pre-Date?

You know what?  Once you get past slavery, Jim Crow, blank stares when you walk into an all white establishment, and Republicans… white people are pretty cool.  My white friends have put me on to a lot of things that not only enhance my kickin’ it, but have opened my eyes to a lot of cool things I otherwise didn’t know existed. 

And you know what?  I like it!  I mean being a black male is hard enough, but trying to be black?  That’s a full time job with part time benefits.  It’s too hard, it’s closed-minded, and it’s fake to say the least.  Why should I have to walk around with a mean-mug on, lookin’ like I got the bitter-beer-face 24-7 while listening to nothing but DMX, Gucci Mane, and Maino?  Why should I have to drink glorified kool aid grape drink and Tampico thinking I’m really getting vitamins & minerals?  Why should Tiny & Toya, Real Chance of Love, and 106 & Park be my must-see-TV?  Oh no, sir!  I need variety.  It’s not about being black.  It’s about being a well-rounded person. 

So today is my ode to a few things white people have put me on… things that I thoroughly enjoy:

1) Jager Bombs – It’s Jagermeister.  It’s Red Bull.  You can’t lose with that.  Jagermeister actually tastes better than Patron, and it’s more potent!

2) How I Met Your Mother – This show is hilariousness.  I’m thoroughly convinced that Goldy or Iceberg Slim imparted all of their knowledge into Barney Stinson. 

3) Judd Apatow – The director of Knocked Up, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Funny People, etc. 

4) Irish Coffee – It can wake you up and cure/cause a hangover.

5) Bars – When you get a table at the club, it’s usually in VIP.  When you get a table at the bar, it’s free.  And it’s the perfect balance of drinking, dancing if you want to, mingling, or just chilling with whoever you came with.

These are just a few of mine.  Name a few things your white friends have put you on…