Tag Archives: first dates

Getting to Know You…

date 0 300x235 Getting to Know You...

Let’s look at a few scenarios:

Scenario 1: A man and woman go out on a first date.  They catch a hilarious movie, and exchange small talk before and during the movie.  After the movie, they go to a wine bar for drinks and conversation.

Scenario 2: An attractive, young, professional woman meets a man who seems to “have it all together.”  On the surface, he meets all of her standards and criteria.  After a couple of dates, she decides to friend him on Facebook, follow him on Twitter, and stalk check out his tweets and status messages from time to time.  She finds that he acts one way with her, yet his tweets and status updates depict an insecure, misoginistic, guy with a potty mouth and a slight obession with Justin Bieber.

Scenario 3: A man and woman, who just met two weeks ago, have been having lunch together 3-4 times a week ever since.  Each lunch date consists of laughs, jokes, discussions on intriguing topics, and deep conversation.

Scenario 4: A couple has been dating exclusively for 2 months.  The relationship is new.   The guy describes his girlfriend as kind, patient, and down to earth.  The lady describes her boyfriend as caring, sweet, and patient.  One day, the woman decides to treat herself to a $150 pair of shoes.  Upon leaving the mall, the woman’s car won’t start.   She calls her man to pick her up.  He just sat in the chair at the barbershop, and said he’ll be there as soon as he gets out the chair.  She hangs up on him.  When he finally arrives, she gets in the car with a visible attitude, clutching her shopping bags, and makes a snarky remark toward him.  He makes a snarky remark back.  They end up arguing in the car and cussing each other out.  During the argument, they both call each other out their names.

Scenario 5: A woman meets a man at a lounge, and is really interested.  They exchange numbers, and agree to go out on a date.  Before going out on a date, the woman decides to look up the man one of those “people finder” sites (that shows public court documents, criminal history, etc.), and finds that he has a criminal record due to a incident that occurred 10 years prior.

Now…

Out of all these scenarios, (assuming the goal is getting to know someone else and not to just end up in a relationship) which one do YOU believe is the ideal way to really get to know someone?

The Pre-Date…

Firstdate3 main Full The Pre Date...

First dates suck. 

You take this big risk, get dressed up, and do all of this planning to get to know a person who actually isn’t even showing up to the date (shout out to 1st date representatives)!  If you go to the movies, you can’t actually converse with your date.  You don’t want to simp spend a lot of money on an expensive dinner.  You want to think outside of the box and do something different without being thought of as weird.  Really… who wants to play paintball on a first date? 

There is an easy solution to this:  The Pre-Date.

It’s so brilliant!  I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it before!  A Pre-Date works like this:  You meet up and do something casual just to see if you would like to continue on to an actual 1st date.  There is no pressure on the man to pay or leave his wallet at home accidentally.  Just do something casual, and go Dutch. The something casual could be something as simple as meeting for drinks after work.  You can get all of the awkward, preliminary 1st date questions out of the way… Questions such as, “So, what’s your plan for the next 5 years?  Do you plan on getting married? Have you ever, out of your own free will, done crack? Swallow much?”  It’s also a great opportunity to see if you have any kind of chemistry.  And if you hit it off?  Congratulations!  You have successfully completed and qualified during the application/pre-screening process.  You will now be granted an interview… and we all know how much we lie exaggerate in interviews.

Here are some great ideas for a Pre-Date:

1)  Happy Hour/Drinks After Work – Not only do you get alcohol, but you get to see if they really have a job or not.  Plus a drink or two can allow both of you to relax.

2) Coffee Shop – Same as happy hour but minus the booze.

3) Lunch – Before deciding on going to dinner, why not have lunch?  Just like meeting for drinks after work, it’s a great way to see someone in their element. 

So, to everyone out there, what are some other good ideas for a Pre-Date?