When you have lived a significant number of years on this Earth, you come to a few conclusions:                                              

People complain about being delayed on a runway for 30 minutes before eventually taking place in the miracle of flying.  A cell phone call takes longer than a millisecond, and we become frustrated.  This is despite the fact that the call is going to a tower miles away or to a satellite in outer space.  You just have to give it a second.  At that point, you realize that everything is amazing, and nobody is happy.

Kids, albeit cute and innocent, get on your nerves.  And sometimes, you may cuss them out in your head for saying, “Eww,” when you are trying to give them bubblegum-flavored medicine… the same bubblegum flavored medicine that 70% of kids across the world would shoot or machete you for.  As a white child, you just can’t say, “Eww,” to bubblegum flavored medicine.  This is especially true for little, white girls who live in America.  Most of their clothes are made professionally by kids their own age.  That’s not to say white people can’t complain, but black people get to complain more. Contrary to claims in the comment sections of Fox News & CNN articles, slavery did not end 400 years ago.  And even when slavery ended, everything wasn’t just amazing immediately after the fact.  Black people with gray hair may remember times when they could only use certain toilets and water fountains. 

When you take all of that into consideration, white people have it made. Now, I’m not saying white people are better.  But being white, well, clearly is better! White people can travel back to any time in history and have it made.  Black people wouldn’t be able to travel past the year 1980.

You also come to the conclusion that deer aren’t cute.  They’re annoying.  You realize the difference between girls and women.  And it dawns on you that Cinnabons aren’t the healthiest things to eat. 

These are a few reasons why Louis CK is one of the funniest comedians out there. 

In case you didn’t know, it’s real out here in these streets.  At any time, it could pop off in the Whole Foods parking lot.  What you know about riding around with trash bags in the Prius, just in case you have to dump a body off… or recycle?  Pusha man soliciting drugs?  Wrong… wrong!  How about a man with a push-pen & a clipboard, soliciting signatures for petitions?

Either they don’t know, don’t show, or don’t care about what’s going on in the ‘burbs.

In New York, a young college student wakes up to get ready for work.  He lives on campus, but his job is in another borough.  Leaving his dorm, he walks a couple of blocks down to the subway to take metro.  During his commute to work, he spends most of his time walking and riding the train.  Earphones, in his ear, he listens to an assortment of rap songs with hard drums, samples, and airy beats that give leeway for the emcee on the song to speak to him.  During his long commute, he wants to listen to every detail.

In Texas, a group of guys are getting ready to go out for the night.    One of the hot spots around town is a local club where most of the fun happens outside in the parking lot.  Groups of people ride slow, cruising the parking lot like an amateur car show is taking place.  The prowess of the ride, from the rims, to the sound, is what’s on full display.  The group of guys gather in an old Caprice that looks like it was made in 2011, but was actually made in 1987.  As they make the commute from the freeway to the club, they listen to an assortment of raps songs with 808 kick drums, soulful samples that sound like 70’s band covers, heavy bass, and catchy melodies for the songs’ choruses.  The sound is the soundtrack for the night.

In California, a group of guys are riding around.  The California weather is just perfect enough for the driver to let the top back on his Impala.  Riding past palm trees, shops, and pretty women, the prowess of the ride is what’s on full display.  Blasting from the stereo is an assortment of rap songs with funk samples, heavy bass, and catchy melodies.  The music is aggressive, yet laidback. 

What am I getting at?

The culture of a region dictates the type of hip hop that is popular in that region.

As far as hip hop goes, not one coast or region is necessarily better.  Good music is good music.  But maybe the cultures of our regions influence the taste for that region.  On the East Coast, people don’t spend as much time in their cars.  Everything is always on the move.  When things finally do slow down, then it’s a time to take in everything around you, including the music.  In the South, we spend most of our time in our cars.  It’s one of the reasons why Southern music and West Coast music have such similar sounds.  Both of our cultures are laidback.  ]

This doesn’t mean that Southerners prefer beats over lyrics, or that East Coast listeners need everything to be deep.  It doesn’t mean that West Coast listeners have a particular preference.  I’m of the mindset, “To each his own.” 

I just know that when I’m on my way to kick it, I want to listen to something with heavy bass, an 808 drum with a kick harder than Habanero, a hook that sets the mood for the debauchery I’m about to get into, with misogynistic lyrics that aren’t outright vulgar, but poetically intertwined with the music in such a way that it’s tastefully vulgar. 

And I want you to hear it from a block away.

How do you like the majority of your music?  Do you prefer catchy or deep lyrics?  Do you prefer wittiness or something that draws emotion?

When Justin Timberlake and Jimmy Fallon cover “BMF” by Rick Ross, then there is absolutely no way that you could possibly hate on it.  Enjoy:

Just when you thought Facebook was on stage four of the five-stages of the social network life cyle (RIP Blackplanet, College Club, and Myspace), ol’ Zuck had a trick up his sleeve to further delay the inevitable.  *Recently it was announced that Skype will be integrated into Facebook, allowing users to make video calls to their friends.

*This move by Facebook was a direct move to counter the announcement of Google Plus.  Google Plus is Google’s new social networking product, which has been getting pretty good reviews even though it hasn’t been officially released yet.

What does this mean?  Video calls and chats will become more common than voice calls.  We’re officially in the age of The Jetsons.  Now that we’ve arrived, what are some ways that video chatting can contribute to the greater good (or evil)?

1)     Long distance relationships – People have already been using Skype, but Facebook has 750 million users.  With the ability to video chat on a whim, an extra 6 months to a year can easily be added to the expiration date of a long distance relationship.

2)     Online dating – It’s no secret that people use Facebook to hook up.  Now, you can actually talk to someone face-to-face before ever deciding to meet up.  By next year, the term, “virtual first date,” will be heard and used everywhere.

3)     Cheating – There is a dark side to the force.  Nuclear energy can be used for a lot of good things.  It can also be used to annihilate entire cities in the form of a missile.  With that said, please believe that people are going to use video chatting to cheat and creep around on their significant others.

4)     Employment – More and more companies are using social networking to market, recruit, and hire new employees.  Looking to relocate to a job in another state?  No problem.  We can interview you via video and still have the same experience as sitting face-to-face.  Just don’t stand up and let us know you’ve been sitting in your draws the whole time.

5)     Fan Interactions – Celebs could hold contests where the lucky fan could win the opportunity to chat face-to-face with their favorite celebs.  This could definitely be a good marketing tool to promote a movie, album, single, book, etc.

What are some other ways that video chatting on Facebook could help or hurt?

In 2011, you should never get a response like this.

If you have been on twitter for a while, then you may have heard the words, “thirst,” “thirsty,” or, “curve.”  These terms may be foreign to you now, but we practice the meaning behind these words almost everyday.  Today, we have decided to break this slang down so that you won’t be naked out there in the world… or end up naked and blaming someone else other than yourself.

Fact:  The thirst is real.

What exactly is, “thirst,” or, “being thirsty?”

Thirst – the act of exhibiting blatant or subtle desperation for the attention, recognition, validation, or affection of another; in a sober state, the act may or may not be direct; in an inebriated state, the act is direct, aggressive, and forthright; at the root of “thirst” is horniness, and it can only be combated with a “curve.”

What exactly is “the curve?“

Curve – the act of combating blatant or subtle desperation for the attention, recognition, validation, or affection of another; a curve is most often indirect, but the meaning behind it is always implied;  the things women or men say and do to avoid someone who is interested in them.

But how do I know what the thirst looks like?  How do I know when I’m being curved?  Ahh, glad you asked.  Here are some examples:

Situation 1: You see a random girl on Twitter who you find attractive:

You: @sanctified_sexxi_mami is looking good in that profile pic. (Thirst)

She replies: Awww, thx boo (Curve)

Breakdown: Upon reading your halfway creepy tweet, she immediately goes to check your profile.  If she finds you attractive, it’s flattering.  If she’s not interested, it’s creepy.  She’s not interested.  In order to help you out, let you down easy, and be cordial, she just says, “Thanks boo.”  She says, “boo,” to everybody though.  You’ve been curved.

Situation 2: You meet a girl, and go out on a date.  The date wasn’t bad, but you’re not sure if it was just great either.  A day after the date, you decide to call or text girl and see how she’s doing.  No response.  A couple of days pass, and you decide to give it another try.  You text her that morning:

You: “Good morning.  Had a cool time when we went out.  Hopefully we can hang out again.  Hope you have a good day today.”

Her: (5 hours later) Hi Friend!  Thx.  (Curve).

Breakdown: Well, friend, you’ve just been curved.  Anytime a woman says, “Hi friend,” it means you have been friend-zoned into the outermost realms of friend-zonededness.

Situation 3: 97% of women who go to NBA All-Star Weekend… give 3%.  With turkey basters tucked away neatly in their clutch handbags, these women have a 3 step plan: 1) Land a baller.  Any baller.  Delonte West will do.  2) Get pregnant. 3) Land on Season 8 of Basketball Wives, officially launching their brand.

Situation 4: You’ve been chasing or in the friend zone interested in a certain young lady for quite a while.  She’s not interested you, but continually “curves” you.   However, as years go by, the tables turn.  She added 50 lbs to her 5′3 frame, and you now look like Dwight Howard in the shoulders.  She sees you out one night.  You both speak.  Her interest is peaked.  You almost throw up.  One day, you get a random text:

Her:  Wow you lost a lot of weight.  You look really good now.  We should kick it some time.  I really want to know how you changed your body so much.  I really need a workout buddy. (Thirst)

You:  Yeah, hit me up on Facebook and we’ll make it happen. (Curve)

What about you?  Name some times where you may have “curved” or been given the “curve.”

Let’s look at a few scenarios:

Scenario 1: A man and woman go out on a first date.  They catch a hilarious movie, and exchange small talk before and during the movie.  After the movie, they go to a wine bar for drinks and conversation.

Scenario 2: An attractive, young, professional woman meets a man who seems to “have it all together.”  On the surface, he meets all of her standards and criteria.  After a couple of dates, she decides to friend him on Facebook, follow him on Twitter, and stalk check out his tweets and status messages from time to time.  She finds that he acts one way with her, yet his tweets and status updates depict an insecure, misoginistic, guy with a potty mouth and a slight obession with Justin Bieber.

Scenario 3: A man and woman, who just met two weeks ago, have been having lunch together 3-4 times a week ever since.  Each lunch date consists of laughs, jokes, discussions on intriguing topics, and deep conversation.

Scenario 4: A couple has been dating exclusively for 2 months.  The relationship is new.   The guy describes his girlfriend as kind, patient, and down to earth.  The lady describes her boyfriend as caring, sweet, and patient.  One day, the woman decides to treat herself to a $150 pair of shoes.  Upon leaving the mall, the woman’s car won’t start.   She calls her man to pick her up.  He just sat in the chair at the barbershop, and said he’ll be there as soon as he gets out the chair.  She hangs up on him.  When he finally arrives, she gets in the car with a visible attitude, clutching her shopping bags, and makes a snarky remark toward him.  He makes a snarky remark back.  They end up arguing in the car and cussing each other out.  During the argument, they both call each other out their names.

Scenario 5: A woman meets a man at a lounge, and is really interested.  They exchange numbers, and agree to go out on a date.  Before going out on a date, the woman decides to look up the man one of those “people finder” sites (that shows public court documents, criminal history, etc.), and finds that he has a criminal record due to a incident that occurred 10 years prior.

Now…

Out of all these scenarios, (assuming the goal is getting to know someone else and not to just end up in a relationship) which one do YOU believe is the ideal way to really get to know someone?

“Thinking that Facebook is forever is like thinking that AOL was the be-all-end-all of the Internet.  Eventually, everyone will use something else.” – Entrepreneur Max Salzberg (via Cnn.com)

Myspace… Friendster… College Club… Blackplanet…

These are just a few of used-to-be-popular social networking sites that have gone by the waste side.  If history tells us anything, it’s that Death has a Google account.  It looks like Facebook is next on his list.

But why do social media sites become less popular over time?  Are they “played out?”  Are they any less innovative? Do they fail to change with the times?  Twitter allowed us the ability to microblog and send updates in 140 characters or less.  Facebook then introduced the “Status Update.”  When you actually look at both sites, Facebook actually has way more features.

The real question is perhaps this: Is it simply that we eventually become bored with what social media sites have to offer?

Looking at this question, it would appear that in today’s society we are slowly, but subtly being conditioned to upgrade.  A new iPhone comes out every 1-2 years.  Windows XP is the equivalent of Windows 95.  Pentium III processors, ten years ago, could get you by just fine.  Today, they could barely let you use Photoshop, watch a movie, and pay a bill online.  Do you still go to Yahoo to search for something?  How long do you think it will be before Xbox 2 or PS4 are on the shelves?

Perhaps that’s what is going on with Facebook.  Despite privacy concerns, Facebook has as many features and users as ever.  But maybe we don’t care about new features.  Maybe my Gmail suits me just fine, and I don’t care for Facebook email.  Maybe I’m tired of being tagged in photos for Jordans, Jordan heels, and fake red-bottoms.  Maybe relationship statuses only matter to 19 year olds and not 29 year olds.  Maybe I can control all of these things, but I’m just tired of the service that allows me to control all of these things.  Maybe, just maybe, I want something new presented in a newer format… even if that something new is something that I already have.

And all of that could mean, just maybe, that I have conformed… Jumping through hoops not to be part of the status quo, so that I can be part of the newest-latest.

Maybe, just maybe, we should choose what works best for us, and stick with that.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/TECH/web/05/04/pandora.comedy.mashable/index.html

“Pandora has expanded from music to jokes with the addition of 10,000 comedy clips from more than 700 comedians to its Internet radio service.”

If you have the Pandora app on your smartphone, then I recommend Chris Rock, Louis CK, Jim Gaffigan, Donald Glover, and of course Kevin Hart.

Avatar a*k*a Space Dances With Wolves has caused a frenzy of  3D movies to hit the silver screen.

I liked Avatar, but I can understand why people weren’t in love with the movie.  Although visually different, it is a movie that has been done before…

Which brings me to the newest 3D(isaster) to hit the screens:   Drive Angry starring Nick Cage.  I was watching the preview the other day and thinking, “This movie is going to be terrible.”  Then all of sudden the announcer says, “In 3D!”  Then I say, “You mean in WTH?”  I guess the movie being in 3D somehow negated all the nonsense that I just saw.

Basically the announcer said, “Get ready for the worst movie of the year… In 3D.”

<sarcasm>Well of course I want to watch it now.</sarcasm>

The problem with the new 3D technology is that it makes people think that they can make a terrible movie, throw some 3D technology on it, and then it becomes good.  Unfortunately it doesn’t work that way.  (See: The Last Airbender).

It’s kind of like a lot of rap music.  Throwing a good beat on a wack song doesn’t always make it better.  (See:  Soulja Boy and Lil B)

Oh, it doesn’t stop there.  Then you get weirdos that make crap like this.

<sarcasm>Finally, I’ve been waiting on this!</sarcasm>

Call me crazy, but watching T.V. looking like I’m having a seizure doesn’t really appeal to me.

What do you guys think?  What is up with people thinking technology make bad things good?

*Also comment if you believe Nick Cage should stop acting.  I think he’s has proven he is not to be trusted to make good movies.